Tired of hearing about fancy-ass microgreens and gluten free grains? Eating real, healthy food isn't a big f**king deal, as the curse-happy creators of the insanely popular Thug Kitchen Blog demonstate in their debut cookbook.
Rise And Shine Already!
Thug Kitchen
Maple Berry Grits
Grits—creamy, slightly sweet, and full of fiber, iron, and vitamin B—don't get enough love at breakfast. Grab some and start your day with a little variety. It's about damn time to try something new.
2 cups water
2 cups almond or other nondairy milk
1 cup stone-ground grits*
1/4-1/2 tsp salt
1-2 tsp maple syrup or your favorite liquid sweetener
1-2 Tbsp of your favorite jam
1 Tbsp (or more if you love 'em) fresh berries
*Not that instant bullsh*t.
1. Bring water and nondairy milk to a boil over medium heat. Whisk in grits and 1/4 tsp of the salt. Bring to a boil again, then lower the heat, cover it, and let that deliciousness simmer for 20 minutes. Stir that sh*t occasionally, 'cause you don't want anything sticking to the bottom.
2. When grits have absorbed most of the liquid and are tender, turn the heat off. Taste, and add the syrup and the rest of the salt, if you think it needs it. That's on you. Top with a small scoop (or two) of your favorite jam and some fresh berries so it looks classy as f**k.
Makes 4 Servings. Per serving: 190 cal, 2 g fat (0 g sat), 40 g carbs, 240 mg sodium, 2 g fiber, 3 g protein
MORE:31 Healthy Breakfast Recipes That Will Promote Weight Loss All Month Long
Bomb-Ass Meal
Thug Kitchen
Roasted Beer & Lime Cauliflower Tacos with Cilantro Coleslaw
Seasoned cauliflower piled into corn tortillas is a special f**king delivery directly to your taste buds. Grab some beer and get to work.
3/4 cup beer
1/4 cup vegetable broth
1 Tbsp lime juice
1 1/2 tsp tamari
1 1/2 Tbsp of your go-to hot sauce
1-2 cloves garlic, sliced
1 head cauliflower, chopped
1 1/2 tsp chili powder
1 tsp smoked paprika
1/4 tsp ground cumin
1/4 tsp garlic powder
Pinch of salt
1 Tbsp olive oil
1/2 yellow onion, chopped
6 corn tortillas
1 avocado, sliced
Quick Lime and Cilantro Slaw (recipe below)
1. Crank your oven to 400°F.
2. In a saucepan, warm the beer, broth, lime juice, tamari, hot sauce, and garlic over medium heat. Add cauliflower and simmer for about 1 1/2 minutes. Then drain that sh*t.
3. Toss spices, salt, and oil in a bowl. Add cauliflower and onion, and coat those f**kers. Bake until browned, stirring halfway, about 20 minutes total.
4. Warm tortillas, then fill them with the cauliflower mixture, slices of avocado, and slaw. Top with some salsa if you feel like it.
Quick Lime and Cilantro Slaw
2 Tbsp lime juice
2 Tbsp seasoned rice vinegar
1 tsp olive oil
1/8 tsp salt
1/2 head green cabbage, sliced thinly
1 small carrot, cut into matchsticks
1/3 cup chopped cilantro
Mix lime juice, vinegar, oil, and salt. Add cabbage and carrots right before you're ready to eat, and toss that sh*t well. Add cilantro and serve.
Makes about 6 tacos.Per taco: 220 cal, 9 g fat (1 g sat), 29 g carbs, 400 mg sodium, 7 g fiber, 5 g protein
MORE:Homemade Upgrade: How to Make a Healthy Taco Salad
Big-Ass Cup of Cozy
Thug Kitchen
Pozole Rojo
Trying to decide between chili or soup? F**k it, have both—and find harmony with hominy.
5 large dried guajillo or ancho chilies, toasted
2 cups warm water
5 cloves garlic, chopped
2 Tbsp unsweetened cocoa powder
1 tsp olive oil
1 large onion, chopped
8 oz tempeh, crumbled
2 tsp soy sauce or tamari
1 can hominy (29 oz)
1 zucchini, chopped
1 Tbsp dried oregano
2 tsp ground cumin
1/4 tsp salt
5 cups vegetable broth
1 tsp maple syrup or other liquid sweetener
Juice of 1 lime
1. Throw chilies in the water and soak that sh*t for 15 to 20 minutes. Remove chilies but hang on to the water. Cut off chili tops, remove seeds, and chop those bastards up. Throw them in a blender or food processor with garlic, cocoa powder, and pepper water and blend until you have chili-garlic paste with no big-ass chunks.
2. Heat oil in a large pot over medium heat. Add onion and saute that sh*t for 2 minutes. Add tempeh and saute until both onion and tempeh start to brown, about 3 more minutes. Flavor with soy sauce.
3. Add hominy, zucchini, oregano, cumin, and salt. Stir that sh*t all together, then add chili-garlic paste. Toss it around so everything is well coated, then add broth. Cover that bastard and let it simmer for 15 to 20 minutes. Add maple syrup and lime juice. Taste that f**ker and adjust spices whatever f**king way you like it.
4. Serve hot with your favorite toppings, such as sliced cabbage, avocado, and green onions; radishes cut into matchsticks; cilantro; and lime wedges.
Makes enough for 6 hungry people, no f**king problem. Per serving: 270 cal, 8 g fat (1.5 g sat), 40 g carbs, 1,140 mg sodium*,9 g fiber, 12 g protein
*Yeah, that's a sh*t-ton of sodium, but if you make your own broth, it will be much lower.
MORE:14 Instagram Accounts All (Mostly) Healthy Foodies Should Follow
Thug Kitchen (Rodale, October 2014). Available here and wherever books are sold.
